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8 Oct

A couple of months ago my mother sent me an email with an excerpt from a book she was reading.

At the time, it wasn’t something that I needed emotionally so I sort skimmed through the email and soon forgot about it.

Ironically about a week later, I got hit with an immense amount of crap (figuratively speaking of course). I began searching frantically for help spiritually because as you might know, I have a hard time admitting (and showing) what I am feeling. I’m way to passive aggressive. Asking for help from anyone is a big deal for me.

Thankfully, I started skimming through my inbox and found the email my mother sent me….

“On the other hand, I have found that when I am in an emotionally vulnerable place, or even if I’m just physically tired, I have to be careful to make sure I am not around people who like to complain or be critical. We must discern and  interacts with people who speak from a place off negativity or unbelief. Normally I will minister to them, but I will not give them access to my life.
 When I’m lacking strength, however I will intentionally avoid them. It may not sound very compassionate, but I am the only one who is responsible for keeping my heart free from doubt and judgment. I alone can recognize when I am vulnerable to the influence of people who agree with these spirits. The powerful effect of peoples personalities and values are given as a warning by Solomon when he says, “Do not associate with a  man given to anger; or go with a hot tempered man, or you will learn his ways and find a snare for yourself: Proverbs 22
 
Not all ungodly counsel comes for the ungodly. While many mean well, they lack the faith perspective that I strive for and tend to work to make me more like them than they do to actually try to help me become stronger in my trust in God. My job is to protect myself from such an influence, especially when I am vulnerable. My heart is a garden. Some people are good at planting weeds, while others plant the kingdom.. My job and your is to know the difference. -Bill Johnson. Strengthen yourself in the Lord.”
 
“Do not associate with a man given to anger; or go with a hot tempered man, or you will learn his ways and find a snare for yourself: Proverbs 22….
I hope that if you are frantically searching for help related to what is mentioned above, that you take it to heart. I read it over and over again, especially when it becomes one of those days….
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What’s Going On?

9 Dec

This morning I watching Good Morning America and they had a segment that I feel I need to share on here. I found the original video that was shown on t.v..

Before I begin, you can take a look for yourself…

If you didn’t understand what he was talking about in the video, he is a gay 14 year old who has been bullied for a long time.

Now this video got tons of responses, including Jane Lynch, Joe Jonas, and Lady Gaga. I think this issue is so important.

Two people I know are very judgmental and mean towards people like Jonah. Although I believe they only talk behind their backs, it still is wrong.

I’ve worn out Google, trying to figure out why people tease and bully others and I found out some explanation.

-they want to be in charge and look tough

-they want people to be afraid of them

-they are jealous of the person they are bullying

-they might have been bullied themselves

There is no good excuse for bullying someone. You have not idea if that person wants to end their life or harm themselves. Do you want to be responsible for ending a life of person who has been tormented?

“I’ve never bullied anyone before”. If you are thinking this, take a look at what bullying really is before you say it again…

-calling them names

-saying or writing nasty things about them

-leaving them out of activities

-not talking to them

-threatening them

-making them feel uncomfortable or scared

-taking or damaging their things, hitting or kicking them

-making them do things they don’t want to do

-cyberbulling

-talking behind their back

-spreading rumors

Have you ever done this to anyone? A person at a school, a sibling, a spouse, your child, family member?

I’ve always heard the saying “It’s a part of growing up.” or “It’ll make him stronger.” but that isn’t the case. My friend “Bob” used to be bullied in a public school. He went through hell and back. His mother notified the school officials several times and once they told her “There is nothing we can do about it. Bullying is a part of growing up. He needs to learn to get over it.”

That statement is far from wrong. By being bullied, someone can feel lonely, unhappy, frightened, sick. They lose confidence in themselves and some days, they want the pain to end.

So what can you do to stop this?

If you are a bully, obviously it needs to stop. No matter if they are gay, black, white, goth, ugly, pretty, fat, have a big nose, wears glasses…etc. No reason justifies picking on someone.

If you see someone being bullied or hear people talking behind other people’s backs, tell them to stop. I know it’s hard if you are in a social situation. You don’t want to become the person who is bullied and lose your friends. But losing your friends is far less painful than living with regret, thinking “I should have done something”.

If you are being bullied, tell someone. Tell your parents or therapist or something. People do care about you. Sometimes it takes a while to find them.

1 out of 7 people have been bullied in their lifetime. Bullying is the number one reason for suicide for teens.

71% of students say bullying is a problem at their school. 282,000 students are bullied each month (those who reported it).

9 out of 10 LGBT youth have reported that they have been harassed at school.

These statistics are too high. And even though it’s a big problem, out of 5 people who read this, three of you will continue to bully and one of you won’t do anything to help.

I have taken a pledge to stop bullying when I witness it, to not bully at all, and to raise awareness for bullying. If you want to take the pledge yourself…

Anti-bullying Pledge

This is for me…

…my friends today…

And my friends tomorrow.

I think being mean stinks…

I won’t watch someone get picked on

Because I am a do something person…

…not a do nothing person.

I care

I can help change things

I can be a leader

In my world there are no bullies allowed.

Bullying is bad…

Bullying bites…

Bullying bothers me.

 I know sticking up for someone is the right thing to do…

My name is (your name)

And I won’t stand by…

I will stand up.

For more info you can go to the following links…

http://www.bullying.org

http://www.stopbullying.gov

http://www.stopbullyingnow.com

Free Smiles

7 Dec

My senior year is almost over.

Six more months…give or take.

I am overwhelmed with a sense of joy and nervousness.

Over the years I did learn some things. Things that I would love to share with you. I could wait until May or June when I graduate to tell you these things but I’m feeling a little sentimental and passionate today.

So sit back and indulge in what I think you need to be a great student or person.

1. Be academically successful. I learned the hard way that you get nowhere with bad or average grades. You become just another average student, in an average school, with average grades. I don’t like being average. I like being challenged. And I do admit I like the fact that I can rub my good grades in my brothers face while he hides his failing report card.

2. Being punctual is key. Running late for school or work is never a good idea. Sure, sometimes you run behind but some adults never learned this when they were younger. They don’t realize the inconvenience for others. Practicing this will help you with #1.

3. Read. Now I understand that some hate reading. You don’t understand it. You can’t put yourself in the story. It’s boring. But reading will give you knowledge that can help with future events…or make a good conversation.

4. Lend a hand or volunteer. It looks good on your resume and you can meet a lot of interesting people. You become more humble and your view of the world won’t be one-sided anymore.

5. Smile! Anyone who has ever met me can tell you that I smile. When I smile, I feel good and whoever I am looking at usually starts smiling too. If you are a pessimist and you think you have no reason to smile, do it anyway. A fake smile is better than no smile at all.

6. Persistance. Have you ever failed at something and just gave up because you thought you wouldn’t be able to do it right? When you are persistent, you keep at it. Attempt at what you keep failing. If you back off, you are only hurting yourself. Even if you are never able to do something, you can say “I tried my best” and actually mean it.

7. Optimistic. Thinking positive will help keep a smile on your face and help you be persistent. You can’t be a downer all your life. You bring yourself and others down with you. You can make a lot of negatives into positives.

8. Don’t compare. “Oh he is such a better football player than me” or “I wish I were smart like her” are two common thoughts that everybody thinks. Even the most optimistic person in the world has thought of something like this once. The key here is to find what you are good at and believe that is good enough. Comparing leads to jealousy. Remember to be yourself.

9. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes. Similar to #6, making a mistake yourself leads to a better learning experience. I know it’s a little cliché but it’s true…and that brings me to the next tip.

10. Forget about what others think. One reason you might be afraid of making mistakes it because of worry. Afraid that people will reject you and laugh at you. Their opinions do not count. If they say that you’re a geek…take a look around. Chances are they are failing at something and inside they are just jealous that you are smarter. And people will more likely admire you because you go your own way and have a “I don’t care what you think” attitude.

11. Find a passion that you enjoy. Whether it be knitting or playing soccer. Having a passion will drive you to do something productive. And when you have a passion, you can teach someone that passion or even make a career out of it.

12. Don’t gossip. I know its hard. I do it sometimes without even realizing I’m doing it. But it leads to others getting hurt and even you. Gossiping leads to rumors and we all know how the rumor mill works.

13. Take criticism gently. Many cannot do this. I live off it. If you criticize my work, I strive to make it better, to not make the same mistake. Sure, some criticism is bad and you should ignore it. But you need to learn how to separate the good from the bad. It’ll help you strive to any goal.

14. Challenge yourself. This one is pretty much the base of it all. You challenge yourself and you could potentially achieve some of the things on this list.

 

Alrighty. Enough with the long list of things to help you succeed. You get my point. And if this information was old news, it might not be to others so share it with others if you want.

Do you have something to add to the list? Or something that should be taken off?

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